Monthly Archives: January 2013

Sacred Bedrooms?

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Lots of family’s I know keep the parental bedroom a secret hideout, no children allowed.
I remember being, not afraid, but reticent to even step over the threshold of my parents bedroom door as grew up.

I can see the reason why, if the children are never allowed in then you can do as you please in the room, if you catch my drift 😉 😉 nudge nudge.

But, I dunno, if you let them know that there are boundaries. Like, maybe, when the door is firmly closed, you don’t enter without knocking and calling first?

For a while, in my house, I felt that the children’s room was just so small that I would allow them the run of ours as well.
It was guilt because there room was just so small, once they had a few toys out they had no floor to play on! It really was bad.
But having spent last summer switching rooms around, what an adventure that was! We got to camp out in the one room at a time whilst the other was completely done up.
Double bed with the single bed attached to the side, all four of us sleeping together.
I Loved it!!
I was almost sad when I finally completed the job and I had to move the children out.
No, I was sad, so were they.
But now, we have spaces that work far better for us all.

Initially B would still allow friends into our room, as she had before, but it began to feel a little uncomfortable. They now had the space they needed and all their toys were in their room, not mine.
What if these children went home and said, ‘We were playing Bs mummies bedroom all afternoon!’
It sounds a bit odd.
I think it worked before because they were young and, mainly, the parents visited with their children so they knew that the children were in there and my reasons for allowing it.
But suddenly Bs friends were coming alone and still going in my room.
It had to stop.

So that was when I introduced the ‘If the door is closed, you don’t go in’ rule.

Sorry, rambled on a bit there.

My point is that, that is the rule.
But there is nothing I like better than hanging out with my children, in my room.
It is comfy, and warn and relaxed.
B and I chat, J and I play Cuddle Monster or just generally cuddle.

Tonight we spent a lot of time in there.
B is not well, so took to her bed for a bit, J thought that seemed a good idea and took to his too. So I lay on mine to see how long it would last
J only lasted 20mins before he was through to me 🙂
So we had some lovely cuddles before he started asking to play on the iPad.
He played whilst I snoozed.
Soon after that J had his bath then came through to watch a bit of telly on the iPad whilst B had her bath.
Because he was settled and it was warm, I brought up our dinner, in bowls, so that we wouldn’t have to go downstairs after baths, it seemed so much colder down there!
B came through, after her bath and they both watched some telly whilst I organised the hot water bottles.
Then Daddy called on Skype and he too was lying in bed.

I find it all so relaxed and relaxing. We are all totally comfortable with it.
Why are other people so worried about boundaries?
Should I worry more?

I don’t feel I should, these are the evenings that I will treasure.

We do a similar thing on weekend mornings and I just LOVE them!
No pressure to be anywhere, do anything. Just spend time together.

Even when Daddy is home, we wouldn’t/don’t change much.

I love my bedroom, why not share that love and comfort with my children?

What we are doing right now

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Tuesday, 1610
After school we rode our bikes home in the rain.

J and B were so good!
I expected lots of moans and complaints from them but there were none!
Ok, so threatening them with the loss of a toy for every complaint or whine, might have been the incentive.

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But it was pretty good all the same. I think it was the fastest that B has ever ridden her bike!
Poor J, he got a new bike yesterday and just can’t make it go nearly as fast as he could his old bike.
He is not used to being left behind by his sister.

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Now we are home, we have hung up all our wet clothes and jumped into our ‘fumfy mumfys’ that’s comfy trousers to everyone else.
The fire is blazing away and the children are content.

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Hey you, with the blue eyes!

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I worry about J.
He has been doing some weird things for a while that make me panic, probably unwarrantedly but hey ho, that’s what I do.
The latest is looking as far to the right as he can with his eyes and turning his head to the left.
Try it, it’s weird and you now look mighty weird for trying!!

So I flagged it up in Nursery to get them to try to gently discourage it but they, unwittingly, set off all my internal alarms by suggesting that I speak to the Health Visitor or GP.

A friend calmed me down by saying that perhaps it is just a tic that will go away, and more quickly if I stop making a fuss of it, in its own time.
That, perhaps, it is brought on by Hubs leaving us again.

The HV thought it was an attention seeking thing but I am not so sure. He doesn’t just do I when I am looking and often is caught unawares when either B or I call him on it.

All three suggested a trip to the opticians to see if it was his eye muscles that were at fault.
I have to say, I had my doubts about this for an idea because he seems to in control of what he is doing.

But along we went and managed to jump the list, April was the first appointment available!

We were seen at 2pm
By 230pm we were out and J has Perfect vision!!
I can’t believe how pleased I am by that! Haha

So what started as a worrying day, following on from worrying over the weekend, now I am super chuft with my boy because he has perfect eyes!

Hang on though. . . . . . .
He is still doing it!?

Dinner at Granny and Grandads tonight though and Grandad did have to retune my fiddle. The look on his face when he tried the strings, haha!

But, after he had sorted mine, and my bow, he sorted Bs, because she messed about with it.
He brought them both down the hall and had us have a wee practice together, in front of my mum, sister and brother in law.
Eek!!
But actually, with my B by my side, and I for her, I am sure, we were both confident and, I think, did a great job.
Go us!
One day we will play real tunes together, though I might not manage because I may well be blubbing with pride, for us both!